Self-care is something that you need to make sure you do, whether you are a mom or not. You want to make sure you’re taking time out of your day for yourself. Remember, you are important. You are someone you need to take care of, to nourish, to protect, and to ensure that you are able to continue to give to those who depend on you.
As a mom, this is even more important. You want to take care of yourself because your children depend on you. If you are not well, emotionally or physically, you may not be providing the quality of care you could be providing.
Understanding why self-care is so important can help you provide better care for those around you, but also to have a better idea of why you need and should take time out for you.
Self-Care might make You feel guilty… But it shouldn’t
It’s easy to feel guilty when you are taking care of yourself but self-care is not selfish. Maybe it is that simple bath and time to do your hair, or just eating a meal that you prepped and ate on your own. Whatever the case, it is very easy for busy moms to feel like you are doing something wrong if you’re not focusing on someone else, but instead, on yourself.
It shouldn’t feel like you are doing something wrong, though.
You have to take care of yourself to take care of those kids. If you are spending time to cut up veggies for the kids, or to make different dinners for everyone that everyone likes, this is going to burn you out over time. Not because of the work, but because you’re not properly eating. You’re not getting sunshine, exercise, or even some unwind time.
So, what all can self-care do for you? We’ve gathered some of the things you should keep in mind if you are starting to feel guilty about wanting to spend time on yourself.
Maintain close relationships
You’re able to better maintain close relationships when you’re taking care of yourself. You’ll better able to relate, to listen, to talk, and to actually enjoy the time you are spending with someone. You won’t feel rushed, or even short with people because you’re tired and irritated. You will create a more wholesome experience for everyone involved.
This is not only friends of yours, but also your husband or boyfriend, your kids, family, and anyone else you have a relationship with. When you feel better, those around you are going to feel better and you can have better quality relationships due to this.
Spend more meaningful time with children and your family
Bouncing off the above point, you can spend more time with your children and family. This time is not going to be rushed, you can actually look when your kid is jumping on one foot and feel excited for them instead of bothered.
As mothers, we can all relate to this experience and situation, but it is not all on us. We will take it like it is, but if you are getting your own time, then you can spend more time with them because you know you will get a break. Everyone needs a break – even mothers.
When you are spending time with your family, you are actually sitting down, paying attention and spending quality time with them. They will thank you for this, they will remember this, and you will enjoy the time you spend with your family more.
Be more patient and understanding
You will be more patient and understanding when you are spending time on yourself. You will not feel like you are irritated, tired, burnt out, and that you need a minute all the time. This is great for those around you because no one wants to deal with a cranky person.
When you are patient and understanding, your children will also thank you. Those little things that happen will not seem like such big things when they happen. This means you are going to react much differently than you normally would.
Your children grow up better because of this, and you feel better inside because of this. These are always great feelings to have.
Our children look to us and how we treat ourselves
Our children see us. They see what we do, how we act, how we react, and who we are. Due to this, it is important that you show them healthy examples of how to take care of yourself. You need to make sure to take some down time and replenish your reserves. If you are running on empty all of the time, this can make you act, react, and seem different than if you had down time.
This is what your child is going to see, and they might even think this is normal.
It shouldn’t be normal.
Showing our children, the best way to deal with life and things that happen is one thing but being able to show them that taking care of yourself is normal and it is natural, and it is what should be done.
This does not mean putting yourself first, but it does mean that you shouldn’t be shoved in the background while you are taking care of everyone else. Taking this time out is going to help you but help them when they see you doing it.
Self-care is a necessity, not an indulgence
Self-care is sometimes thought to be an indulgence by some, and even go as far as saying it is selfish. However, taking care of yourself is a necessity and should be thought as such. You need to take care of yourself in order to be there to take care of others.
If you are not taking care of yourself and you feel fine, you are only going to feel fine for so long. This is something to think about. It is a slow trickle that will catch up with you later on. This is important to keep in mind, as you might feel fine by not taking the time out of your day to do simple tasks like brushing your teeth or hair, or even just getting dressed. These things can make you feel more put together and better about yourself.
This burnout when it catches up can be damaging to your physical and emotional health. This then will damage those around you. Taking some time, and making time, for yourself is essential and a necessity for everyone.
Create a healthier household
Have a healthier household overall due to the care you’re giving yourself. You are spending more time with them, and it is quality time. This is a big difference that people don’t realize. This difference is going to make all the difference in how everyone in the household grows, lives, and thrives.
By keeping your cup full, you’re helping everyone else to have fuller, better cups, as well. This is always a good feeling to have and something worth taking the time off to do. You want to fill your kid’s cups, right?
Think of self-care as being able to fill their cups by filling your own first. They can’t drink from an empty one. If you are empty, you have nothing to give them. Fill yours to fill theirs with.
Quick & easy self-care ideas
Use these quick and easy self-care ideas to take better care of yourself, which in turn, will help you take better care of those around you.
- Say no to more people, especially if it is something you don’t actually have time for,
- Get a hobby that you feel good about doing and enjoy doing,
- Eat healthier, exercise, and make your health a priority,
- Get counseling and speak with someone about how you feel,
- Take time with your partner by going on a date and reconnecting without kids,
- Ask for alone time by the household to replenish,
- Set some goals for yourself and try to accomplish them bit by bit, and
- Stay connected to yourself and be happy with yourself.
It has actually been shown that anticipating a vacation or time off is actually more rewarding than the actual time off. So, taking the time for yourself or knowing when this time is going to be is going to make you want to get to it. The anticipation is going to keep the person going.
You want to make the most of the time you spend on yourself, but you absolutely need to make sure that you do spend time on yourself.
Even if it is not very long, even if it is just once a week. Having this time for yourself is going to make such a huge difference in the way you are able to keep up. You will be able to nourish your soul while you nourish the souls of those around you. Moms are not the only ones who benefit from self-care. There have been a number of studies conducted that show that everyone benefits from self-care. And self care definitely makes for a better mom!
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b Helen