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4 Ways to Calmly Manage Disrespectful Children

Calming children displaying disrespectful behaviour
Photo provided by the guest blogger.

Sometimes it seems like kids feel entitled to talk back and be disrespectful children. They often don’t want to listen to parents, saying, “You can’t tell me what to do!” This causes friction in the household and makes mum and dad feel anxious and frustrated. To help, when you feel your kids aren’t listening; you can try using one of KiddyChart’s reward charts or progress charts. They are great for children up to the age of nine or ten.

But remember, we all have bad days as parents, and there are things you can do to remain calm with disrespectful children. Here are a few tips when it comes to disciplining kids and maintaining calm in the home:

4 Ways to calmly manage disrespectful children

Make a commitment to be calm

As the parent, it’s your responsibility to lead by example. If you’re calm your kids are more likely to calm down, too. Take charge and promise yourself you’ll no longer let yourself be emotionally pulled into arguments, even when your child is pushing your buttons. I know how hard it can seem to stay calm, but you’ll find that having that emotional distance allows you to be more objective and rational.

Establish rules and boundaries

Communicate to your children that they are expected to follow these rules. Say “no” when necessary—take a stand if it is in the child’s best interest. Before deciding on a rule or how to discipline, have a talk with your partner to make a game plan. Establishing rules helps everyone to feel calmer.

Pause, breathe…and wait

Don’t immediately respond just because you’re in the heat of the moment. Take the time you need to gather your thoughts, ground yourself and think about how you’ll handle the situation. This could mean going to your room, reading a book or doing something soothing. Finding the space between your child’s action and your reaction allows you to calm down. Know when to step back and breathe, breathe, breathe at those times.

Question instead of judge

When you are ready to talk instead of scream, ask yourself, “What’s going on? How can I communicate in a calm way?” If your child is still upset, say to him, “We’re not going to talk about this until you calm down. I’m going to give you time to think. Let me know when you’re ready to talk later.” This way, both you and your child will have time to cool off, think clearly and be proactive instead of reactive.

Be there for your kids as a support and for guidance. Be open and respectful to your children and that will help them eventually open up and be willing to be influenced by you. Remember that backtalk and arguments may take some time to resolve, but you can make it happen. Do, however, expect respect and make it clear.

By following these tips, it is possible to reduce the stress in your home and get on the path to calm. Remember: The only person you have control of is yourself. So, take charge and commit to staying calm. It seems like a simple idea, but you will be surprised how your kids will react. Calm is contagious, and if parents are calm, kids will soon learn the importance of getting control of their emotions as well.

Do you have any tips for calming disrespectful children? If you do, let us know below.

If you enoyed this post then check out these other great posts about handling disrespectful kids from the web.

And these from KiddyCharts, too:

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Helen is a mum to two, social media consultant, and website editor; and this site is (we think) the only Social Enterprise parenting magazine! Since giving up being a business analyst when juggling travel, work and kids proved too complicated, she founded KiddyCharts so she could be with her kids, and use those grey cells at the same time. KiddyCharts has reach of over 1.1million across social and the site. The blog works with big family brands (including travel) to help promote their services, as well as offering free resources to parents of kids under 10. It gives 51%+ profits to Reverence for Life, who fund a number of important initiatives in Africa, including bringing running water and basic equipment to a school in Tanzania. Helen has worked as a digital marketing consultant (IDM qualified) with various organisations, including Channel Mum, Truprint, Talk to Mums, and Micro Scooters. She loves to be creative in the brand campaigns she works on. Get in touch TODAY!

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